SWEET GIRL GRADUATES.

ON Cambridge honors, so some say,

The ladies soon will seize;

When "students unattached" become

"Our girls," and take degrees.

But when in college larks and lore,

With men these maids are matched,

I fear though "unattached" before,

They 'll soon become attached!

- Punch.THEY have had a great row at Oxford because all the students of University College, Oxford, have been "sent down," i.e., suspended, for screwing up a proctor's door.

THE '80 Class Fund has reached $7,970. The average subscription to the combined Class and College Funds in the different College buildings is: Grays, $84.60, Littles, $76.25, Thayer, $69.00, Holworthy, $66.00, Weld, $63.25, Matthews, $62.30, Holyoke, $59.10, College House, $50.00, Stoughton, $45.60, Hollis, $45.45.

As the Yard will be paled in after 5 o'clock, on Class Day, and as no one will be admitted without tickets, it will be necessary to observe some care about invitations. The best device is to enclose with the invitation a card asking whether Yard tickets are wanted or not. All who are coming before 5 o'clock will not need them.

EPITAPH ON AN EASY-GOING INSTRUCTOR.

+

The man who reduced

Smoking to a Fine Art,

Rum to a Science,

and

Teaching to a Luxury.

R. I. P.

COLLEGE statistics from the Lasell Seminary at Auburndale: "Twenty-nine wine-colored dresses; twenty-two blue sacques."

Literary young man at party. - "Miss Jones, have you seen Crabbe's Tales?" Young lady (scornfully) - "I was not aware that crabs had tails." Literary young man (covered with confusion) - "I beg your pardon. I should have said, read Crabbe's Tales." Young lady (angrily scornful) - "And I was not aware that red crabs had tails either." Exit young man. - Unidentified Exchange.

Professor: "Miss C., give an example of a true conclusion drawn from two false premises." Miss C. - "Logic is an easy study. That's false. I don't like easy studies. That's false. *** I don't like logic. That's true." - Vassar Miscellany.

Miss H. (who has chosen medicine as a profession, to Professor, who has given the class an ox's heart to dissect). - "Oh! Professor, can't we have forks to handle it with?" - Vassar Miscellany.

1st Senior: "I say, Bob, you are not going to slope the last day, are you?"

2d Senior: "Why not? It's my last chance." Princetonian.