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Mechanical Muddle

Brass Tacks

By Cliff F. Thompson

The old house to house peddler will soon be no more than a memory. Like the lamplighter that faded away over a quarter of a century ago, the doorstep salesman is fast becoming the victim of a cruel technology. The unending onslaught of bigger and better devices for the Good Life has added to his wares such items as electric pencil sharpeners and hair-scratching devices. And on occasion, he may even sell a Modern Magic water closet, a miniature reducing machine or even a toothbrush with a plastic handle to hold the paste. Even now his display case bulges to twice his size, and the New Devices spell a certain doom.

The peddler is not the only one concerned with the effect of the modern machine. Senator McCarthy has already suggested that the Lic Detector replace certain public officials in the examination of accused Army men. Many experts have joined with the Senator in heralding the new trend. Robert L. Skinner of Pierson comments, "It will be a glorious day when the machines of science can judge in the Courts, in the Jailhouses, in the Government, in the Committees . . ."

Science has struck another blow for justice with the development of the alcohol detection machine. One model has a simple arrangement that needs only a blood specimen from the suspected inebriate for its operation. Another requires the consumption of large quantities of water. Yet many still have little faith in the new devices and lament the disappearance of the chalk-line test. At a recent civic meeting, a New Orleans official gave a demonstration in the hope of inspiring interest and confidence in the Drunk-O-Meter, a type that measures the alcoholic content of the breath. Placing some 70 proof cough syrup at a handy distance, he prepared to give a before-and-after exhibition. Unfortunately, either he or the machine was smashed and the meeting ended in a general state of disorder.

The cybernetic or "thinking" machines of the International Business Machine Company have undergone an especially rapid development. These impressive monsters can actually translate a few hundred words of Russian into English. And better things are promised for the future. Inventors report that in a few more years the machines should be able to read books to themselves and locate selected page numbers for anyone interested.

Computors on a smaller scale are already being installed in banks and businesses. One average machine (about the size of an office locker) can replace several clerks. But with prices running into seven figures, the mechanical brains are still a rarity in the business world.

Despite the alarming trend toward larger and more complicated machines, there are a few lingering signs of hope. Section men have not yet turned in their red pencils for oximeters and the local banks still have people behind the counters. But there are rumors that IBM has a thinking machine lobbying in the Senate.

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