The NBA Playoffs are here once again,
Where the Hawks become mice, and the Heat become men.
>Atlanta ain't chillin'; they are almost on ice,
And Miami is blazing, thanks in part to Glen Rice.
The number one seeds? Must be some kind of joke,
As on easy three-footers Kevin Willis doth choke.
They have but one more chance, these pretenders in red,
Or else Manning and Ehlo can go straight back to bed.
From the West come the Sonics; they know how to kampf;
That's "fight' said in German, as one might hear Schrempf.
With Kemp and McMillan, Seattle's legit;
Much unlike said Atlanta, these Sonics are fit
For an NBA title, once the Nuggets are past,
And Utah abolished, the Rockets then gassed.
There's far too much game in the Pacific Northwest,
For anything less than at least second-best.
"Aha!" cry the critic, "They're not from the East!"
And it's true in the playoffs, where Chicago's been beast,
It's physical ball so oft' gets the job done
And when Karl and Seattle demand run and gun,
The skeptics have ammo; and thus pick New York
For in Ewing alone, they have lots of "D" torque.
They'll dunk past the Nets, and in large part without Starks--
He's the heart of their team, their creator of sparks.
Oh, and speaking of sparks, let's now go down to Texas,
For the psychotic fool who's the NBA"s nexus.
Named Rodman, he's just about seven-feet tall, colorful
With colorful hairdos to mystify all.
A couple of T's made him sit out Game Three;
To hear him then whine--sounded quite like a "she".
He's good on the rebound, but I like the jazz:
Give Malone the last laugh, 'cause the "Worm" is a spaz.
The Bulls without Jordan? Come now, give me a break;
Because three Scottie Pippens doth one Michael not make.
They were lucky with Cleveland, its front line all in pieces
And the "Czar of the Telestrator" begging to Jesus
For a rebirth of Nance, or more treys from Mark Price
Or a healing of Daugherty, that would have been nice.
But alas, 'twas a sweep, score was three games to none.
Ha, but wait for the Knicks--I'm sure that will be fun.
Pat Riley's too smart, and New York just too good;
They'll destroy damn Chicago, like every team should.
And the Pacers? Oh please. To be East Conference Champ?
Indiana should prove quite the good launching ramp
To the whole enchilada, 'gainst Seattle in June.
And with Patrick against them, the Sonics won't boom.
"The Big Apple Is Happy! New York Wins It All!"
I hate me for saying so....But that's it from here, y'all.