Clay P. Bischoff '03
Hometown: Coral Gables, Fla.
Ideal date: Mexican food and bowling. Let me win.
Ideal mate: Adorable but has an edge, has a good sense of humor but laughs at my jokes.
Your sexiest physical trait: An unexpectedly hard body.
Best way for a girl to get your attention: Bare midriff. With a smile.
Sketchiest moment at Harvard: My lawyer has told me to plead the Fifth.
Any advice to the poor, ignorant first-years? Get out of Harvard Square as often as you can.
Your most outrageous attempt to get a girl: Wearing a life-jacket as a diaper and nothing else.
Where to find you on a Saturday night: Off at a sailing regatta or drunk at a bar near you.
Your best pick-up line: “Hi, I’m Clay. Want to take a ride on my dinghy?”
The most memorable pick-up line a girl has ever tried on you: “Do you have a license to drive me this crazy?”
Any plans for making senior year amazingly memorable? Take two years to finish it.
Describe yourself in three words: Sailing sex machine.
In 15 months you are: Warren Buffett.
In 15 years you are: Jimmy Buffett.