FM Gift Guide

It’s that time of year again. The Christmas lights are up, the red and green sweaters are out, and stores everywhere are throwing year-end sales. Haven’t you bought your gifts yet? No need to fret. FM’s got you covered.

Your Parents

Good: Season 3 of “Modern Family”—$23, Best Buy. Watching Phil, Gloria, and the rest of the gang will undoubtedly bring the whole family together.

Bad: Whooping cough—free, the freshmen dorms. You don’t want to bring this illness back home with you, but if you spend too many nights in Weld, you just might.

Weird: “Magic Mike” on DVD (2-disc edition)—$15, Target. That awkward moment when you watch a movie with your parents and a sex scene comes on? Imagine that for a full two hours...with male strippers.

Your Chemistry Professor

Good: Periodic table coffee mug—$15, www.amazon.com. Any chemist will remember a quirky gift that incorporates the periodic table of elements and caffeine.

Bad: Periodic table underwear—$29, www.amazon.com. The line for acceptable periodic table gifts is drawn somewhere between mugs and underwear.

Weird: Season 5 of “Breaking Bad”—$22, iTunes. Unless you intend to use this drama about a chemistry teacher-turned-meth-dealer to send a message, this might not be the right gift.

Your Roommates

Good: Dinner at the Russell House Tavern—$50-$300. Treat the roommates to some quality bonding with delicious food if you’re willing to drop the cash.

Bad: Dinner at your residential dining hall—free. This isn’t a gift.

Weird: “50 Shades of Grey”—$10, Barnes & Noble. Hopefully your roommate bonding doesn’t include bondage.

Your Significant Other

Good: Pinkberry gift card—$50-100. Everyone loves Pinkberry, and a gift card is a quick and easy gift.

Bad: Pregnancy test—$8, CVS. Depending on the results, this could put a damper on the celebrations.

Weird: “All In: The Education of General David Petraeus” by Paula Broadwell—$12, Barnes & Noble. Exactly what kind of message are you trying to send?