Mad Lib: Networking

Why hello ___________ (insert name of potential future employer)! What an ________ (excellent/fortuitous/unfortunate) coincidence seeing you here!
By Madison E. Gonzalez

Why hello ___________ (insert name of potential future employer)! What an ________ (excellent/fortuitous/unfortunate) coincidence seeing you here! I was just thinking about pursuing a professional career in __________ (finance/computer science/binge drinking).

Now remind me, what __________ (investment bank/start-up/fake job) are you with now? Wow, ___________ (Goldman Sachs/Facebook/your mom’s basement), you say? What a __________ (thrill/accomplishment/disappointment)! I think my ____________ (uncle/third cousin once removed/childhood babysitter) works there as well. Do you know them?

Of course you do. Isn’t she/he just the most _____________ (kind/hardworking/intolerable) person you’ve ever met? … Yes, I couldn’t agree more. The three of us should grab lunch __________ (someday/after I land this gig/when pigs fly) and ______________ (make awkward small talk/peer edit our LinkedIn profiles/sit on the couch).

In the meantime, if any positions open up at your company, I would love to be ________ (informed/hired) immediately, because I’m really ____________ (interested in your company/nickle and diming it right now). Among my qualifications are knowledge of basic arithmetic and __________ (Excel/NotCS50/beer pong). I also had a(n) ____________ (enlightening/painfully boring) internship at a(n) _____________ (investment bank/quant firm/summer day camp) last summer where I _______________ (gained many skills/read a lot of Buzzfeed/fell asleep and ignored the kids).

Anyway, it was great talking to you! Let’s certainly ________ (keep in touch/connect on social media/never see each other again).

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