Resident Dean Name Change, Take 12

Before anyone even noticed that upperclassman resident deans had been renamed “House deans,” administrators changed their name again (they’re now “assistant deans of Harvard College”). To save the College some time when it inevitably changes the title again (likely in the next one to three days), we've decided to offer up a few suggestions:

1. T.H. Chan Assistant Deans of Harvard College

With a donation that large, the Chan family should have convinced Harvard to rename every position, building, library, dining hall, and grill special after them. (Unfortunately, the T.H. Chan turkey burger with avocado doesn’t seem like a likely prospect).

2. Allston Burr Residential Assistant Deans of Harvard College of Harvard University of Cambridge, Massachusetts

Dean of Student Life Stephen Lassonde said earlier this week that deans wanted their title to be easier for people outside Harvard to understand. What better name to choose in this case than one that specifies literally every facet of the position? Just in case anyone outside Cambridge was curious.

3. Dean Khuranas #2-18

This choice of title not only pays tribute to Harvard’s new and lovable dean, but also makes it less wordy. (If the College chooses to adopt such a title, every resident dean must acquire an equally adorable social media presence via Instagram).