So You're Clingy: A Guide To Non-Romantic Obsessions

Valentine’s Day is upon is, and that means we’re all thinking about our significant others…and no, not necessarily romantic ones. For all of you who missed out on cuffing season or don't have a bae to fantasize about during the next boring CS lecture, don't forget all those other 'special someones' in your life: roommates, friends, even that 'adorkable' TF. But just because someone is “significant” to you, how do you know those feelings are mutual? And more importantly, when does clingy become too clingy? We've assessed all your non-romantic relationships, and here's what we found.

Friends

Symptoms: You always need to know where they are, in case your life falls apart unexpectedly. You hate it when they talk to other people in the Dhall. Their roommates are asking you to get your stuff out of their common room.

Pros: You never have to eat a meal alone. You never have to be social if you don’t want to be. You have someone to support your stupid ideas and do them with you.

Cons: You probably don’t have any other friends – and you don’t think you need them. You deal with paranoia and friendship jealousy on a daily basis. New friends won’t approach you because they know you’re taken.

Roommates

Symptoms: You make jokes about what they look like without make-up to feel superior to their friends. You have a sign-out whiteboard by the door so you can always know where they are. You feel cheated on when they sleep over with their significant other.

Pros: Your home feels like a home because your roommate is family. You know exactly who to live with next year (and all the years after that). You can share wardrobes.

Cons: You hate knowing that they have friends who live beyond your room. You can’t avoid them if you’re in a fight. Your suitemates can’t stand your late-night giggling.

Professors

Symptoms: You go to office hours every week – and you lie about the location of their office when classmates ask you. You sit in the front row of lecture. They always call on you because you are the only one whose name they know. You have invited them to “Classroom to Table” meals at least once a week.

Pros: You have someone to write future recs. You are probably getting a good grade in the class. You get to spend Harvard’s money on “Classroom to Table” lunch.

Cons: The rest of your class definitely hates you. The prof might also hate you, because they wanted to write a chapter of their new book during office hours. And your TFs might hate you too for being a try hard.

Sections

Symptoms: You only study with people from your section. You hate when kids from other sections show up to your class because your TF is better. You organize events unrelated to class, like Ec10b and chill.

Pros: Group work leads to higher grades – there is a lot of research on this. Your pset friends might become actual friends. You always know who to sit with during lecture.

Cons: You are notoriously exclusive. You never bother to meet your future spouse who sits behind you in lecture. You will face the inevitable break-up of the group at the end of the semester.