A Little Levity
My hate/hate relationship with running began in High School when I realized that I was never going to be fast and that my playlists would never be good enough to make me fast. At first, I tried my best putting on a brave face while being lapped by six-year olds and paraplegics. Then I hung up my running shoes for good, and began getting my daily intake of endorphins from thinking about exercising and actually eating cupcakes. After all, running is supremely boring. The only thing more boring than running a mile is running two miles, which gets me to perhaps the most dull pursuit of all: running a half marathon.
I started out by running 1/26th marathons in high school gym class. As fulfilling as those 3.5 laps around the track were as I overlapped an old woman doing walking arm workouts, saying “I just ran a 1/26th marathon” didn’t have the right ring to it. I wanted to run something that sounded impressive.
Both: After age 23, only mentioned in nostalgia After two weeks in the library, smell slightly stale The earlier, the better Grey Goose is better
With the holidays just around the corner, winter cheer has begun to parade across campus, and yet anxiety as to what to get your Secret Santa abounds. This year, to help you brainstorm what to get your gift exchanging boo, FM imagines what members of certain student groups on campus give each other.
As the wise and respected social leader on campus, FM was inevitably going to be asked how to be “cool” one of these days. Recently, a first year we’ll call “Josh” (because his real name is Josh) came to us asking how to survive the brutal social life of a male Freshman on campus. Four of FM’s best weighed in to turn Josh’s social woes into social woooooahs.
Reading period is a great time to do in a week what you should have been doing all semester. Whether you need to catch up on reading or drinking, FM created a game that suits both.
Dear Yale, With the game in two days, you’re the only thing on our mind! Going a whole year since we’ve last seen you has been almost unbearable, but we’re looking forward to being back in your arms soon.
With the Harvard-Yale game fast approaching, it’s a good time to reflect back on all that Harvard athletes have accomplished since the school’s first intercollegiate competition in 1852.
The Harvard-Yale Game, which dates back to 1875, is one of the oldest and most notable rivalries in the history of college sports. It is also one of the most highly anticipated events of the college year for students from both schools. Regardless of whether or not you’re a sports fan, the weekend of The Game is a weekend for memories. These memories will not be created in a cubicle of Lamont or in the silence of Widener—you will likely be alone and crying in these places if you choose to stay behind. Throw on your Crimson gear, get yourself down to New Haven, and keep these do’s and don’t’s in mind as you prepare and proceed for a legendary weekend.
While trips to the quad are often categorized as “too far to travel,” Harvard students shuttle to The Game at Yale every other year. FM imagines what some of the conversations on these buses might look like.
Both: Go there when drunk Uncomfortable seating Washing hands a necessity Smells like shit
Both:Have the same chance of getting into Harvard
Come next weekend, hundreds of Harvard students will be piling into buses to make the famed pilgrimage to the rough and tumble streets of New Haven, home of the number one safety school. To pass the travel time as Harvard prepares for its seventh consecutive win, take a listen to these classics:
Matthew S. Ackerman ’14 is participating in No Shave November.
Taras B. Dreszer ’14 will be growing his beard out for No Shave November.