If only our environment wasn’t so circumscribed by email searches and hidden cameras, funding restrictions and a near complete lack of student input. Because it probably takes more than bouncing hot dogs to truly explore and learn.
For the uninitiated, this week is Passover, an eight day holiday in which your favorite local lawyers and doctors, the Jews, celebrate their exodus from Egypt by depriving themselves of everything remotely edible.
All houses were created equal, the same way your parents love you and your siblings equally, ignoring the time they gave your brother a new car for Christmas to replace his old one, and they didn’t even bother to give you, the older sibling, a new bicycle.
President Faust, I am told, was scientifically correct, but could have sounded more insensitive only if she had Skyped into the meeting from her private villa somewhere in the Caribbean, swimming in a pool of hundred dollar bills.
In preparation for finals week, you should first learn the hours of Dunkin’ Donuts. Starbucks is for hipsters, who sip double-whipped peppermint mocha frappalattes and write “underappreciated works of contemporary societal analysis.”