AUTOMOBILES: WAYS AND MEANS

Xerxes and Byron had their Hellespont, Moses his Red Sea, and Caesar his Rhine and Rubicon, but none of them showed the ingenuity of the local engineers confronted by King Charles. They could solve their traffic problems and divert traffic from Harvard Square by extending Memorial Drive along the Charles's left bank, but that was too easy. They might well have thrown a bridge across the stream from Gerry's Landing, but that, ah, that was too hard. The bridgebuilders had hydrophobia, a condition unusual in bridgebuilders, and calling for unusual measures. Eureka, they would build the bridge on dry land! Did one but object that such a bridge would not span the river, the masters of the scheme should shake their heads wisely and murmur, "Mahomet!" So the river will be brought to the bridge.

The CRIMSON finds great consolation in one patent fact. No officials of Lehman Hall, nor of University Hall, nor of Pierce Hall, or even of Baker Hall, have anything to do with the great bridge project.