LAMPOON FATTED CALF TO BE DEVOURED BY CRIMSON TODAY

Justly-famed 14 Plympton Street home of sprightly, ebullient Harvard CRIMSON was swathed in Darkness last week and in fact also last night, as smooth-chinned executives worked feverishly taking the wrape off a star pitcher imported from Sears Rocbuck. Guardied reports were issue at two-hour intervals by Armband Squibb, moulder of men and destinies.

Meat of these reports concerned a specially trained pornographic editor trained vigorously for the last three weeks to carry baseballs in his mouth. This crafty maneuver is calculated to outwit feeble-minded Lampoon Men who will furnish the opposition for the stalwarts. All loose-knit players will gather together to ask for aims at 2:30 in the CRIMSON edifice.

Greatest feature of this ball carrier is that he can talk perfectly normally while hiding the ball in his mouth. IN practice sessions several candidates, playing against the CRIMSON Varsity, were amazed and said so. One instance stands out especially, a news cafligsk umbubble craanenk tis fras derdenderder- sorry well, anyway, it's tricky as all hell.

Muchado on hearing these lascivious runtors threatened to withdraw from the show. Armband took this is stride, saying fire till you seeurgglt flash trash mask crask umguggle 23-2.