Bedbug Commandos in Savage Sabbath Raid

A smart and well-disciplined plague of bedbugs has struck the University, it was reported last night. Every Sunday night for the past three weeks certain insects of an undetermined nature have been biting an inhabitant of Hastings Hall during his sleep. Although the exact species is unknown, scientists studying the bites last night stated that they had reason to believe that the attackers were of the bedbug order.

P. David Muzzey IL is the victim of these Sabbath invasions. Although he has never been able to capture any, he thinks that they are bedbugs. Other opinions at the Hygiene Building range from ants to mosquitos. Muzzey feels that it is a little cold for mosquitos. Hastings Hall is, however, noted for its abundance of overgrown ants.

Muzzey's wounds were not serious after the first two assaults, but last Monday morning he awoke with an injured thumb. Half way through the day the thumb swelled up and turned purple, so Muzzey rushed to Stillman, where it was diagnosed as a bad infection.

Muzzey is still confused by the unwarranted invasion, but is preparing for another attack tomorrow night. He feels that there must be some significance to the fact that the raids occur on the Sabbath, but cannot see why the bugs have chosen him. "All the other guys here only get love bites," he stated disconsolately.