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"And This One's at Faneuil Hall (Wish You Were Here)"

By Nevin I. Shalit

Meet Mr. and Mrs. N. They live somewhere in New Jersey. Their daughter's name is Nadia. Nadia wears Kimbies. Mr. N drives a silver Cadillac Seville (he earned it) and wears his Princeton University ring (his symbol of achievement). Mrs. N doesn't drive.

Mr. N was just promoted to vice president in charge of sales at his college buddy's company. Mr. N is taking a long vacation-- --one whole year, in fact. One night he and Mrs. N drew up a list of cities they had heard about, and arranged them in alphabetical order: Albuquerque, Boston, Canada, Detroit, Englewood, Fairbanks.... Mr. and Mrs. N decided to visit the cities in the exact alphabetical order that God created them in.

Mr. N realizes that it takes a lot of gasoline to go touring around the country in a Cadillac Seville, but at least he doesn't have to worry about the prices. You see, Mr. N's brother is a professor at MIT, so now he has an Exxon-MIT charge card. It's good for free gas anywhere in the United States or the Persian Gulf.

I met Mr. and Mrs. N at Faneuil Hall. (What's Boston if it isn't Quincy Market?, they asked me.) Mr. and Mrs. N liked Albuquerque just fine, but they were surprised it was so far from Hackensack; it looked a lot closer on their Exxon-MIT map. (You're so lucky to live in such a big country, Mrs. N often tells Nadia.)

In the photo on the top left Mr. N is focusing his camera while Mrs. N gets Nadia ready. Mr. N might actually take a picture when mommy fixes baby--it's more candid that way. And besides, if daddy doesn't like it, Fotomat will refund him the price of the picture.

In the photo on the bottom left Mr. N takes a picture of his wife and baby. This will be a good one, because all he has to do with his new Canon (he was going to buy an Olympus, but he doesn't like Cheryl Tiegs) is focus and shoot. Mr. N has no trouble focusing. Copies of this picture will go to all of the grandparents (there are three sets due to divorce and remarriage) and the Princeton University Alumni Bulletin.

The photo in the middle isn't important.

Mr. and Mrs. N were in a hurry to get to Canada, and I was in a hurry to take more pictures (two of which you see here), so that's all I know about them.

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