Sounds of Harry Homer Caray

It's official: Chicago Cubs' announcer Harry Carary has reached the Land of the Untouchable Celebrity.

After a comment he made a two weeks ago during a Cubs telecast on cable superstation WGN, Caray could announce naked and still get away with it.

With the Cubbies down by a few runs to the Astros, Chicago slugger Andre Dawson stepped up to the plate. Instead of telling the audience that Dawson could very well hit a home run with the wind blowing out of Wrigley Field, Caray had to proclaim something like, "Come on, Andre, hit one out so we can get back into this ballgame."

It is perhaps the most biased call ever heard on a broadcast, but since it was Caray who committed the blunder, no one really paid attention.

You see, since the fans love Caray so much, WGN wouldn't dare tell him to tone down his hometown act. Unless the station would like to have its building burned down.

And now, with the publication of his autobiography giving Caray cult-like status around the nation, there's no way he'll change his act. He might as well start wearing Chicago jerseys on the air.

Caray joins a elite few who have reached Untouchable status, including Frank Sinatra and the pope.

Holy cow.

Pete Rose and Gary Hart must be related.

What was Charley Hustle thinking by denying that he bet on baseball games? John Dowd, special counsel to major league baseball, had prepared a 225-page report that had almost every bookie in America saying Rose bet on baseball.

And when August 25 rolled around and Rose was banned from the game for life, the former Cincinnati manager still wouldn't admit the truth.

Somehow, a lifetime ban will not make fans and writers forget Rose, the game's record-holder for most career hits. It's kind of hard to overlook what Rose accomplished as a player. Interesting to see whether he eventually makes the Hall of Fame. If Rose does, then so must "Shoeless" Joe Jackson, Orlando Cepeda and Ferguson Jenkins, just to name a few greats whom baseball has forgotten.

The Rose saga took a strange twist when baseball commissioner A. Bartlett Giamatti died from a heart attack eight days later. Giamatti was set to make his mark on the game before Rose's situation became a top priority for the former president of Yale.

Now, baseball has lost one of its own.

Whoever edited the October issue of Sport must be watching too many Brooke Shields movies.

The issue devoted most of its space to the "glorious decade" of the 1980s. Everything came out fine, except for Tom Kertes' piece on basketball.

Sure, Kertes mentioned Larry Bird and Magic Johnson, but not once did he talk about Michael Jordan, perhaps the star primarily responsible for turning the NBA into a marketing bonanza.

This is the same article that speaks of Mark Eaton and Manute Bol. Ignoring Michael Jordan's impact in the 1980s is like ignoring Moses' brief stroll across the Red Sea. We're talking biblical proportions here, folks.