Much Too Busy

Harvard is a crazy place. In four years here rarely have I had an opportunity to stop and think about what has been happening to me; there was always work to be done, something to get to, someone to see. Even over the past week, after all academic obligations had evaporated, the partying and debauchery of senior week was simply an alcohol-enhanced version of the same crazy, energetic state of affairs that seemed to have been the norm over the past four years. As Dean of the College Benedict H. Gross ’71 mentioned in the Class of 2007 yearbook, everything here, especially from an undergraduate’s perspective, is experienced at a “high baud rate.”

This restless energy is the engine that drives Harvard, from its research labs to the hurried lives of its students. Everyone is always busy, busy, busy. It would not be unfair to extrapolate and say that this busyness is directly linked to the excellence for which this institution is renowned (either as cause, effect, or both). From the hectic Crimson newsroom to e-mails from professors I’ve received at 3 a.m., 4 a.m., and even 5 a.m., it seems that a lot of people here have an inordinate capacity to stay busy.

My time at Harvard has been busier than I had ever imagined it could be. I cannot count the number of times I’ve speed-walked through the Yard on the way to the next section or rehearsal, nearly mowing down tourists as I typed away furiously at my BlackBerry. My long legs enable me to reach the Science Center from my room in Quincy House in exactly five-and-a-half minutes, regardless of weather conditions; this has proven invaluable on a number of occasions. My course load and myriad extracurricular commitments have provided an unbelievably fulfilling and awesome experience, but have left me with far too many memories of those frenzied walks to class and far too few of relaxing walks by the river. Not that the river is really all that pleasant or relaxing most of the school year, but still.

I’ll always remember the lectures of Associate Professor of Government Glyn “This is Moral Reasoning 50: The Public and the Private in Politics, Morality, and Law” Morgan, who one day in lecture randomly decried how busy everyone at Harvard “had” to be. He recounted a story of how impossible it was to arrange to have coffee with another professor, noting that it was “unfashionable” to admit to being free tomorrow afternoon. Instead, the other professor was apt to pull out the BlackBerry and suggest a date several months into the future, projecting a busy façade regardless of his or her actual schedule. This anecdote has proven strikingly apropos in more situations than I would care to admit.

But what does being so busy all the time do to us? From time to time it certainly makes getting out of unwanted obligations easy, but I have often wondered whether or not my constantly busy state has prevented me from doing things that I probably should have done. This applies to every facet of my Harvard experience, from academics to my social life. I have often found myself involved in things that, in retrospect, I shouldn’t have committed to—not because I didn’t have the time to do them, but because my penchant for staying busy simply got the better of me.

I think the most important lesson I’ve learned at Harvard is one that I’ve only recently tried to recognize and implement. Being “busy” carries with it several bad connotations. First and foremost is the implied lack of agency: When I feel “busy” it comes with the feeling that things are happening to me, not that I am causing things to happen. Secondly, being “busy” makes for a chaotic lifestyle, as the crazy hair and stressed-out expression that I unwittingly tend to carry ended up in far too many people coming up to me over the years and saying, “I saw you the other day but didn’t say ‘hi’ because you looked so stressed out!” So, I’ve committed myself to being engaged and deliberate, but not “busy.” Hopefully this slight change of wording will enable me to spend more time thinking about why I’m doing what I’m doing, while shedding the burden of stress that being busy brings.

We are all exceedingly lucky to be here, and to have had the chance to experience the great busy energy that defines Harvard. I’m pretty sure that Harvard will continue to pulse and throb with the bustling energy of its students and faculty, but I hope that it eventually gets to be a little less busy.

Chrix E. Finne ’07 is a music and mathematics concentrator in Quincy House and the first marshal of the Class of 2007.