On the fateful day of November 21st, we shall all march down and trod on the uncivilized swamp of Connecticut. Our hearts are filled with pride, our spirit pumped, and our livers conditioned to produced enough ADH enzymes to last for several hours. Here at Flyby, we have carefully mixed a few drinks to get you through the weekend.
1.5 oz. of tequila sunrise
1 oz. of random school pride
Garnish the drink with stripes of unfinished psets
Listen up, my dear fellow patriots. To fight against the “blue devil” of Connecticut, we must all make some personal sacrifices. This is a drink made especially for those “Lamonsters”. I know it’s hard, but forget that pset due Monday morning. It’s Friday. Who needs to do work on a Friday? This blissful ignorance will give you the best time of your life (that is, until Sunday evening).
1 can of Beer
4 oz. of School Pride
3 dashes of bitterness against Yale
2 oz. of your red face paint
Most of your voice
By the time the tailgate starts, most of you will still be so intoxicated that you won’t even notice what you’re drinking. With enough spirit and pride, bad beer can carry you for at least three hours before the actual game. This is a great time to talk to that particularly cute gal or guy in your math class and bond over your mutual hate of Yale. Your half-dissolved face paint can be the confident booster. If anything goes wrong, definitely blame it on the face paint.
On the ride back:
YUCK, I feel sick
1oz. of vodka
2 dashes of bitter
1 oz. of dry humor
2 tablespoons of regret
We win the game again. We just beat Yale by like 1,000,000 points. Yale sucks! Yale sucks! As you are happily chanting with your fellow students, a sick feeling will suddenly creep upon you: Shoot. I didn’t do any homework.