The blog of The Harvard Crimson

What to Show Your Friends When They Visit

Whenever anybody drops by Cambridge to visit us, we are faced with a dilemma: do we flex on them as hard as possible or go the humble route? Do we go on typical Harvard tourist activities or drag them to only niche hole-in-the-walls? Ah, the trials of living on such a tour-able campus.

For the ‘Salt of the Earth’

If your visitor is all about the small things, take them on a stroll along the Charles River. The views from the Weeks footbridge are sure to be a reminder of the sheer scale of the Harvard community. Grab some HUDS oats for any ducks and geese you may see swimming along (avoid dumping them on the crew team). Bonus points if you drop some wisdom about how the sights remind you “to stop and enjoy the journey once in a while before it’s all gone.”

For the ‘Pseudo-Intellectual’

If your friend is convinced that Harvard is a temple to wisdom and innovation, maybe avoid Lamont and the realities of college life. Go to Widener instead where the grandeur of the Loker Reading Room and Harry Widener’s study with its Gutenberg Bible are sure to impress. If that’s not enough, swing by the stacks and show them floor after floor of books that encompass all of human history. Maybe leave out the other thing students do in the stacks.

For the ‘Goldman-Sachs Interns’

If your guest is more interested in Harvard’s endowment than our classes, opt to take them to the Harvard Art Museums where all you need to sound fancy is to talk about the “brushwork” and say those few words you remember from French 10. Casually drop alumni names like FDR and JFK. Finish it off with brunch at Henrietta’s Table. Just don’t mention you’re paying with Crimson Cash.

For the ‘Party Animal’

Let’s be real — social life at Harvard is a struggle. This option is rather niche, but if your person is interested in living out a scene from “Spring Breakers,” a final club is probably your best shot. If you’re less inclined, however, you could go the Quad and crash a couple of parties there. Hit up the common party spaces like the Aquarium or the Igloo. Make sure you get there early though; if the ambulances are there before you, you’re probably out of luck.

It’s ultimately up to you to figure out what your visitor is looking for in Cambridge, but fortunately, Harvard’s got a wide range of options for all kinds of people. If none of these are calling to you, maybe just take them to grab a burrito from Jefe’s at midnight and then watch Netflix together in your common room. It won’t be amazing, but at least it’ll be realistic.

Housing Day Playlist 2019

Good music improves any good time, and Housing Day is no exception. Whether you’re "Crying in The Club" because you’d "Rather Be" in the "River", or you’re feeling "Good as Hell" and ready to call home and say "Hey Look Ma, I Made It" because you got the house of your dreams, this is the playlist for you. Featuring fresh new bops and songs from iconic housing day videos, check out our Housing Day 2019 Spotify playlist.

Housing Day How-To for Upperclassmen

Every year around Housing Day, PAFs, proctors, and the College at large trip over themselves to tell freshmen exactly what to expect and what to do. But for upperclassmen, it’s not as clear how you should go about Housing Day, from dorm-storming to skipping classes. So, we put together some advice for those of us on the other end of that fateful Thursday. If you’re going to pretend to love Harvard for one day a year, you should go hard, right?

Listen to HoCo

We know, it sounds like the most boring tip in the world, but each house does actually have its own procedure on the morning of Housing Day. Your HoCo should have a plan in place, so be sure to know what’s happening when. That way you won’t wake up earlier than you need to...or, worse, stumble into the dining hall after everyone’s already gone. Which brings us to...

You Don’t Actually Need to Wake Up That Early

If you want to grab breakfast and hang out with the growing crowd, then you can be up at 6 a.m., or whatever floats your boat. But realistically, even if your house is super aggressive about being the first to Harvard Yard, don’t expect to leave on time. Nothing is stopping you from just rolling out of bed and joining the dorm-stormers.

Dress Practically

The only reason you might want to be on time to breakfast is to make sure you get a t-shirt in a size you prefer. If your HoCo is good about sizing in their orders, this shouldn’t be an issue, but if you’d rather be safe then go for it. And don’t wear something you particularly like to storm dorms. Mud and/or snow is almost guaranteed to get all over your footwear (and possibly your pants!) as you cavort around the Yard, and you do not want to be the sucker in white sneakers.

To Alcohol or Not to Alcohol?

Maybe we’re all really freshmen at heart, because while they debate whether or not to River Run, we’re deciding if pregaming on a Wednesday night is the smart thing to do. Some people truly think they should stay up all night, which sounds terrifying to us, but you do have spring break to sleep it off…

Overall we’re on the fence about whether or not alcohol actually improves the Housing Day experience. Yeah, it would be funny to go to your morning classes plastered, but the dorm-storming itself is a messy business of running up and down cramped staircases. You decide if you want to be sober for that or not.

It’s Not About You!

As nice as it is to see that some houses really can manage to muster up spirit for one day, the most important thing to keep in mind is that Housing Day is about the freshmen, not you. Dorm-storming is fun for us, but it can be really overwhelming to have a crowd of questionably sober upperclassmen rushing into your suite. Enjoy yourself, but be conscious of how freaked out the people in the suite are, and consider dialling it back every now and then.

We know that housing is not that deep, and the vast majority of people grow to really love where they live. Freshmen don’t necessarily know how true that is. So if you’re in an “unpopular” house, take a moment to reassure the incoming class. And if you’re in a “popular” house, feel free to wild out...but don’t take it out on frosh who get an “unpopular” one. Your personality can be more than just hating on the Quad, you know.

Extenuating Circumstances

In general we are very pro-skip-your-classes for such an occasion. But there are certain circumstances that mean even house pride should be put aside. If you have a midterm, for the love of all that is good, go to your midterm. Seniors, if you’re turning in your thesis the night before Housing Day, don’t put off your work. Housing Day is really fun, but it will come another year for most of us.

Whether you’re new to Housing Day as an upperclassman or not, the prospect of a quarter of the college finding out where they’ll spend the next three years deserves celebration. This housing day, have a blast with your house and Harvard spirit, and make it a day that the freshmen will remember.

Housing Market 2019!

It's time for Flyby's annual countdown to Housing Day with our annual feature: Housing Market!

3/7: Today we're featuring the Quad Houses! Check out our writers' deep dives into the housing, community, and quirks of Pfoho, Currier, and Cabot here!

3/8: Today we're featuring the Houses of River East! Check out our writers' deep dives into the housing, community, and quirks of Dunster, Mather, and Leverett here!

3/11: Today we're featuring the Houses of River West! Check out our writers' deep dives into the housing, community, and quirks of Eliot, Winthrop, and Kirkland here!

3/12: Today we're featuring the Houses of The Square! Check out our writers' deep dives into the housing, community, and quirks of Lowell, Adams, and Quincy here!

Happy Housing Day! May the Housing gods look favorably upon you!

Overheard: LS1b Midterm

With midterms in the air, no one loves to complain more than the STEM kids in our lives. This holds especially true for those poor pre-med students and procrastinators alike who gathered last Monday for the LS1b midterm. We sent a reporter to witness the pre-exam fun.

“I have one pencil that actually works...”

Ah yes, we’re back at that point in the semester where we have exactly one pencil to our name, and any papers we get are just shoved into our backpacks. Not even the impending doom of a midterm can motivate us to toss an extra pencil into our backpack before walking into the exam room. Spring break really can’t come soon enough!

“Does anyone have an extra calculator?” “Yes, but it’s a small baby.”

They really weren’t kidding. Imagine hoping for that TI-84 of your dreams, and instead getting one that fits in the palm of your hand. I’m not sure what kind of math happens during these midterms, but hopefully for the sake of this poor soul it wasn’t anything that requires more than a “baby” calculator.

*Quietly slides a succulent into their bag as the test is starting*

A good luck charm? A gift? One last reminder of happiness before a terrible exam? Not sure if more or less context would make this better, but either way this is probably one of the best test-taking strategies I’ve seen. Remind me to grab a small houseplant on the way to my next midterm.

“I just threw up in my mouth.”

You know, I feel for you. LS1b seems like a tough time. Would I be feeling like this if I had to take it? Probably. But to be fair, you did sign up for this. Maybe try to avoid the whole throwing up thing though — I can’t imagine that would be good for your Scantron.

Judging by these comments, I’m really not sure how well this midterm went for these poor pre-meds. But all jokes aside, to our future doctors, don’t let one #yikes of a midterm get you down. And to the rest of you, here’s hoping that your midterms are a lot less stressful.

The Best Blocking Group Names of the Class of 2022

March 2008
Well done, Class of 2022
You know it’s spring at Harvard when all anyone can talk about is panicking over summer program application deadlines, getting wrecked by pre-Spring Break midterms, and anticipating Housing Day. Check out this Flyby-approved list of some of the best blocking group names from the Class of 2022!

block and roll (like rock and roll)

A classic pun. We also appreciate the explanation — nearly missed the joke there.

Block Dirty To Me

As hardcore Jason Derulo fans, we are ~living~ for the song reference.

Dean Khurana's phone number

The one thing that everyone wants. We’re curious, though — does a name like this increase your chances of getting a Quad House?

Does this spark joy?

This name absolutely does, and we’re hoping your Housing Day will too.

hollaBLOCK girls

Our favorite bop of the mid-2000s rolled into a blocking pun? Yes, please.

It's 5 O'Block Somewhere

Though there are quite a few puns with the word “block”, this is the perfect blend of classic and original. Good work, y’all.

Lawrence S. Blockow

Please link with “Dean Khurana’s phone number” and bring our favorite Harvard bromance to life.

Shuttle Asian Traits & Subtle Asian Blocking

Your favorite Facebook page forever immortalized in a blocking group name. Hopefully you get the Quad or Mather so you can make use of that aforementioned shuttle on the daily.

STAYK AND LOIBSTAH ONLY HEEUH FOH A LEEMITED TOIME

This name had us cackling for days on end. Good work, you meme-loving lunatics, and props for being willing to step outside of the “blocking” pun world.

With the excitement (and drama) of blocking in the rear view window, all that’s left now is to wait in anticipation for the one and only Housing Day. For now, though, keep flexing your oh-so-clever blocking group names while they’re still relevant.

The Top 3 A La Mode Dhall Desserts

Ice Cream Sandiwch
It's as easy as 1, 2, 3!
Although it’s always hard to make something Instagram worthy, it’s still worth trying out these desserts made from dining hall ingredients when you’re too broke and cold for J.P. Licks.

Ice Cream Sandwich

As the title suggests, you need two cookies with ice cream in the middle for this one. Heating the cookies in the microwave beforehand makes it 1,000 times better, and adding some sweet toppings like melted peanut butter, caramel, or banana makes it ever better. Crushed up Froot Loops on the side is also a great way to go.

Fruit Parfait

This one’s a nice refresher on a Tuesday morning. It’s pretty self explanatory: Take a plastic cup and start with a layer of yogurt at the bottom. From here you can get creative and try a layer of chopped up banana, another layer of yogurt, or a layer of crumbled cookie. The possibilities are endless — bonus points if you make it pretty.

Cup Sundae

A sundae in a cup! For this one, you can mix together three quarters vanilla ice cream and one quarter chocolate milk for a little extra flavor (coffee or chocolate ice cream are great options too). Top it off with any dessert items you can find, including but not limited to cake, fudge, whipped cream, cookies, and banana chips.

Voilà! Enjoy your dhall dessert a la mode!

Harvard Grad Schools as College Students We All Know

HKS New Campus
If everyone knows them and their face is plastered all over campus, they're the Kennedy School
Rumor has it that there’s more to Harvard than the Smith Campus Center, the Yard, and El Jefe’s. Every undergraduate contributes to campus culture at the College, just as every graduate school contributes to the greater University culture. While our knowledge of grad schools may be limited to those odd cross-registration general education courses (and we weren’t able to include all of them in this article), their distinct personalities can be reflected in some of the classic College student archetypes that we all recognize.

The Kennedy School

That popular classmate who has introduced themselves to everyone in their grade at least twice. You might not be familiar with what they do or how they work, but chances are you’ve seen their name and/or face splashed around campus more than once. They know people from all over and aren’t shy to meet you...and campaign for your vote.

The Law School

The section kid who treats every question like it’s the last they’ll ever hear. They are academically focused and intense. It’s possible to be close with them, but it takes a bit more effort. Although they take themselves seriously and it seems like they have their whole life planned out, chances are they’re as lost as an economics professor in an ethics class.

School of Design

The student who dresses nicer on a Thursday morning than you will on your wedding day. They enjoy being the center of attention and can be found at all of the social events on campus. They’re unique no matter what angle you consider them from, but they might be judging you for wearing that stained high school sweatshirt four days in a row. No, they’re definitely judging you.

Medical School

This is the classmate who has a passion and a purpose, and you can’t help but be a little jealous of them. They’re in extracurriculars you didn’t even know existed, yet somehow everything that they do seems to come together in a cohesive narrative. Sure, life looks a little less rosy when the only thing they can talk about is drowning in organic chemistry, but at the end of the day this student is confident and self-assured — must be great to have a sense of direction in life!

Harvard Extension School

The only friend that seems to have great judgement and some experience of what the “real world” is like. They’re the person who told you that three slices of dhall sausage pizza is a terrible idea, and that Annenberg has a side door that lets you in after the front door locks. Their humble qualities are refreshing to see, and they make you look whiny when you complain about a pset you had a week to do.

While it may be hard to keep track of the vast number of Harvard grad schools, they each have their own distinct presence on campus. Next time you’re wasting away in section, don’t be surprised if you start categorizing your classmates by grad school.

How to Exercise in Cold Weather

Cabot House Gym
weeeeeeeeerk it
So spring break is coming up and you’re not feeling quite ready to bare any skin for beach photoshoots. Or maybe you’re getting restless from doing work at your desk all day. Either way, your subconscious (and your mirror) has been telling you that it’s time to hit the gym. Here’s why the “it’s too cold to work out” excuse doesn’t cut it.

House gyms

Sorry to leave you out in the cold, freshmen, but House gyms are the move for anyone who doesn’t want to brave the elements for a workout. They’re usually well-stocked and not too crowded, plus working out in-House gives you the chance to show your dhall crush how good your stamina is (or not).

Hemenway and the Malkin Athletic Center

Just stop avoiding them. They’re conveniently located for anyone who lives in the Yard or a River House, and have just about any piece of equipment you may need. If running on a treadmill makes you feel like a caged hamster, try out one of the many group exercise classes that they offer.

Get into a relationship

The much-needed human contact will give you a reason to quit complaining about the cold weather (after all, it’s still cuffing season). Additionally, your romantic partner will have you doing mental gymnastics at least a few times per week, so you can get a workout without going outside. But if this option doesn’t work…

Just go outside

As long as you work out on a relatively warmer day, the winter air won’t be too painful. Plus, avoiding puddles and jumping over snow banks can give you that extra tone you’ve been needing.

Sorry for taking away all your excuses! We might even take our own advice and go outside sometime this week (not like we really have a choice since the Faculty of Arts and Sciences refuses to close).

Which Harvard Building Are You?

Flyby Investigates: Harvard Architecture - Smith Campus Center
Are you the Smith Campus Center?
Harvard is a school for building up pain tolerance, but the human body can only take so many psets and papers. Put self-care first by taking this fun quiz that will answer the question we’ve all been dying to know: Which Harvard building are you?

1) Which song are you whipping out at karaoke?

A) “New Light” by John Mayer

B) “Toothbrush” by DNCE

C) “No tears left to cry” by Ariana Grande

D) “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion

2) If your friends were to describe you in one word, it would be:

A) Trendy

B) Reliable

C) Nerdy

D) Extra

3) What are you concentrating in?

A) Undecided

B) Humanities

C) STEM

D) Social Sciences

4) You can’t leave your room without…

A) Your credit card

B) Your favorite paperback

C) Your calculator

D) Your monogrammed ballpoint pen

5) What is your biggest fear?

A) Losing popularity

B) Having your GPA fall

C) Not getting into med school

D) Being on a ship that collides with an iceberg

Results:

If you got mostly A’s...We’re not surprised — grade inflation really comes in clutch. Congrats, you’re the Smith Campus Center! Newly renovated with an ideal location, you are beloved by all. However, no matter how confident you might be, you’re the new kid on the block and are looking for a real connection.

If you got mostly B’s...We’re sorry — it B like that sometimes. We hate to break it to you, but you’re Lamont Library. Though you’re nothing to call home about, you’re very reliable and are a great shoulder to cry on. In fact, people enjoy your company so much that they often stay the night.

If you got mostly C’s...Don’t worry — C’s get degrees! But not grad school or med school unfortunately. It’s probably not a surprise that you’re the Science Center. When life gets hard and you feel like you’re drowning in psets, just know that people admire your incredible intellect and exceptional pain tolerance.

If you got mostly D’s...I don’t think your parents will be D-lighted to hear about those grades, but hey, if I’ve learned anything from Economics 10A: “Principles of Economics,” it’s that Harvard is the best place to find your wealthy spouse! That shouldn’t be too hard given that you’re Widener Library! You’re classy and full of knowledge that may or may not be relevant. Keep up the charm and pretty soon you’ll be counting stacks.

The Ultimate Balancing Act: A Guide to the HUDS Paper Cup

When we say balancing act, we’re not referring to how you’re doing “so well” taking five classes, doing three different consulting clubs, and only spending two nights a week in Lamont. We mean something far, far more impressive: the HUDS paper cup. Though you could of course use this little disposable (and eco-friendly) miracle for its intended purpose, it’s way more fun to think of all the ways to stuff as much as possible into it for every meal (if you can get past the judgemental stares of the HUDS staff and your fellow classmates).

Breakfast

After weeks of the same old plate full of eggs, mushy fruit, and cereal, why not try something new in a fun, disposable container? Just think of all the friends you’ll make in your 9:00 a.m. when you come in with armfuls of mid-class snacks!

If you’re looking for something sweet, we all know that pancakes are actually just a vehicle for syrup, so get a full cup of syrup and a pancake to go with it! Feeling more on the savory side? Here’s a cup we like to call the “deconstructed egg sandwich”: just use hash browns as a bread base and pile in the eggs and bacon plus seasonings of choice.

Lunch

We all know the struggle of trying find time to sit down and eat with the Harvard Time-less schedule, especially when we forget about our friends over at the hyphenated Fly-By. When your schedule just doesn’t seem to work out, the HUDS paper cup is there to help you speed through the lines before your next strangely-timed class.

On these chilly fall days, we like to at least pretend to be clever by filling up a heaping bowl of the best chili HUDS has to offer (personally I’m a white chicken fan). Just don’t forget to grab a piece of bread for dipping to really complete the “warm meal by a fireplace” vibes. Or if you’re feeling like an adventure into the salad bar, toss in your lettuce of choice, make it hearty with beans, chicken, or some other protein, and throw in all the toppings and dressing you can fit. You’ll never need to drop another $10 for a Sweetgreen salad again!

Dinner

Sometimes, we all need a little touch of class in our lives – candles and cloth napkins not included. Whether it’s a break from p-set grinding with friends or an evening with that special someone (we’re looking at you, d-hall crush!), a meal served exclusively in these little cups can be a welcome change from the typical HUDS green tray.

For those who want to get bougie af: simply load up your cup with rice, order a fried egg from the grill, whip up your sauce as you wait, and add veggies plus your sauce and egg to your rice for some high quality HUDS-style fried rice. And don’t forget dessert! Fill that cup to the brim with a nice swirl of ice cream, drizzle on plenty of chocolate syrup and whipped cream from the fridges, and if you’re feeling creative, add in whatever fruit they have to offer that day. (After all, if it has fruit it counts as healthy, right?)

In the end, we’re a firm believer that any meal can be greatly improved with a HUDS paper cup. Just make sure to grab some cutlery and napkins, and you’re all set for your paper cup meal!

Open Letter to First-Years: Blocking's Not That Deep

happy group
Dear Overly Excited First-Year,

You’ve almost made it to Housing Day, the one day of the year Harvard actually shows some school spirit (other than slapping on a red sweater and invisible drunk goggles for Harvard-Yale). Housing Day is one of Harvard’s best remaining traditions (RIP Harvard Time). Truly, it’s a blast — upperclassmen get up at stupid hours of the morning, throw on house gear, and storm the Yard to tell you what house you got.

But for all the fun Housing Day brings, some parts of it can be stressful — namely, blocking. We’re here to tell you that blocking is really not that deep.

Some people will be best friends with their blockmates all four years, some blocking groups dissolve before the end of the semester — and that’s okay. You get here in August, and Harvard basically tells you, “ Welcome! Here’s a new type of schedule! We get that you’re (likely) living on your own for the first time, that there are thousands of clubs to join, and that you have more freedom than you’ve ever had in your whole life, but you’ve got six months to make your lifelong best friends that you want to live with for the remainder of your time here. Piece of cake!”

Take a breath and remember that friends don’t disappear just because they’re not in the same house. There are best friends who live in the Quad and Mather and make it work even through the “long distance” jokes.

If your blocking group is so big it’s threatening to leave someone out, don’t be mean and exclude someone — just split the group and link. No, don’t look at us like that. Just do it. It saves a whole lot of drama and keeps people’s feelings from being hurt. Pull names out of a hat to split the group if you’re really that pressed. You’ll still be in the same neighborhood.

Conversely, if you don’t have someone in mind as the deadline looms closer, or if all the blocking drama reveals how shallow your “friends” are, remember that floating doesn’t make you lame or a loser. It’s easier than you’d think to make new friends once you get to your house. In fact, being a floater might encourage you to get more involved in your house community next year, and meet even more awesome people!

Your blocking group does not have to be made up with your ride-or-dies or people you want to room with. It can be, but it doesn’t have to. (In case no one’s told you, you don’t actually have to lottery to room with your blockmates, a blessing if you’ve got some messy friends or everything falls apart). Your blocking group, at its most basic level, should be made up of people you wouldn’t mind seeing around the dhall for the next three years.

So fret not, first-years! Focus on the fact that every house has its perks and on the excitement of Housing Day, not on whether your blocking group will be the most iconic of all time. We promise you, it won’t be. At the end of the day, it’s really not that deep.

What Your Midterms Study Spot Says About You

If you’ve poked your head into a library this week or tried and failed to schedule a meal with a friend, then you’re well aware that midterms are afoot. Midterms cause members of the Harvard species retreat to their natural habitats (aka their favorite study spots), so what does your choice of study spot say about you?

Tatte/Starbucks

You’re writing new novel — congrats! Whether you’re a humanities concentrator writing a 100-page thesis or a STEM concentrator grinding out two (2) complete paragraphs, there’s something about the smell of overpriced coffee and saturated fat that’s sweet for writing.

Dorm Room

You’re working on a complicated assignment that demands your every brain cell (even the ones in the back singing “Mo Bamba”). You’re pretty used to working alone though, and rumor has it your suitemates haven’t seen you since you came back from break.

Library

Notebooks out, laptop charging, tears flowing — that desk at Lamont is all yours. You’re working on that final project that’s due in four hours, and need a non-distracting place. Aside from the occasional dramatic glare outside the window, there’s nothing that you can do in that drab wooden cubicle except for work.

Common room

You’re doing “work,” but the kind of work where it’s okay if you take four hours to do one question. Talking to people coming in and out of the building/room is your forte, and there’s nothing more refreshing then having some literal and figurative tea with friends after a long day.

Smith Campus Center

You’re doing light to medium work, something like a doable pset or readings for class. The Smith Campus Center’s confusing vibe (Were they going for minimalism? A plant aesthetic? But with the color orange?) isn’t the best place for thinking of ways to cure cancer, though. The unique chair choices are mainly ideal for lightweight reading, like “The Communist Manifesto.”

Wherever you choose to do your midterm studying, good luck securing a spot and make sure to bring a laptop charger. Welcome to the rest of the semester, folks.

Prospects Post Datamatch

So you went on some steamy Datamatches, you added them on Snapchat, and they never responded to your 2 a.m. “wyd?” message. Devastating, but in the words of Kelly Clarkson, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Now you’re back at square one, so what’s a person to do? Don’t worry — we’ve got some ways for you to shoot your shot, this time without the help of the Harvard Computer Society.

Slide into your lecture crush’s DM’s

Next time you’re sitting in Economics of Big Data, say hi to the cutie who you sit several empty seats away from. Maybe ask them how their day is going. Maybe airdrop them a meme if the lecture is particularly boring and you’re feeling particularly brave. It’s amazing what a simple “hi” can do.

Beg your friends to set up a date for you

Sure, you may never have met your friend’s linkmate’s study buddy, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t your soulmate. Use your friends as matchmakers and demand that they send your number to every person who sounds remotely interesting. This is what people mean when they talk about all of Harvard’s incredible resources. If your friends start to run out of ideas, you can always try LinkedIn.

Swipe, and swipe some more

Tinder was made for a reason. Sure, you’re (once again) putting your romantic future in the hands of a computer, but who’s to say it won’t work out this time? Don’t forget to include “Harvard [your class]” in your bio, and make sure you list out all your impressive achievements, that way everyone will know just how cool you really are.

Set up a ~totally unplanned~ meet cute

Go sit in a coffee shop and read an old romance novel, looking interesting and approachable. Or drop all your books in front of a hottie who you can charm with your clumsiness and intelligence. If all else fails, move to Paris and stroll the streets in a trench coat, looking longingly out over the Seine. Romance movies are real life, right?

A dead end Datamatch isn’t the end of the world. You’ll live to date again, and there’s no time like the present to get back into the ring. And if all else fails, remind yourself that as long as you love yourself, you’ll never be completely without love.

An Open Letter to My PSET Buddy

Cabot Science Library
To my dearest PSET Buddy,

This morning as I was doing cartwheels over my last PSET grade, something occurred to me. Getting up from my tumble, I thought back to that Tuesday night when I actually did the work and one face swam up from the midst of all the numbers imprinted on my eyelids.

I never could have done it without you (or I could have, after much mental anguish and 10 days after the deadline)! You’re always the one who bails me out the night before the PSET is due, when a week of bad decisions has culminated in what’s sure to be a terrible evening for me. It’s just a little further, you tell me with a smile, and I can’t help but shake my head into focus and talk through the problem with you. And suddenly, it’s not just the homework questions — it’s all the questions which have bothered me all week. Am I screwing up my life? Does the TF dislike me? Am I doomed to this vicious circle of procrastination and self-hate?

You are everything that is whole and good about the world. You violate every rule I lived by in high school — trust no one, watch your own back, feign affection for and interest in others. I’m sure other people must have exploited your brains, but I’m happy that you kept alive your optimism and concern for all those around you. The best thing about the nights (and mornings) we spend together is the faith you have in me. You look into my eyes and you believe that somewhere deep down, I know the answer or am capable of finding it. You give me confidence in myself.

Do not be surprised if you find care packages and hear an excited voice calling your name, because besides showering you with hugs you didn’t ask for and gifts you do not need for the rest of the semester, how else can I ever repay you? In the meanwhile, I guess I will try to emulate your philosophy any time I see a desperate soul in need at 2 a.m. on a Sunday night, and dream of the night when we get to hang out not hunched over a set of stapled pages in Cabot Library.

Yours truly,

A Rescued Soul

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