Capital Campaign, Flyby Remix

By Vivian W. Wan

In two years, Harvard’s capital campaign has amassed $6 billion in gifts and pledges from donors. Some projects this money will go towards includes professorships, residential house renewals, and the School of Engineering and Applied Sciences.

If we at Flyby had $6 billion to burn for Harvard however, what would we get?

Brand-name cereal in the dining halls - $10,000

Fancy post-modern furniture for dorms - $4,000,000

Mopeds for Quadlings - $20,000,000

Free Lamont Cafe coffee - many monies

Air conditioning (for the first, and only, two weeks of heat experienced during the beginning of the year) - $30,000,000

Renovate Adams House (I live in Adams, so I'm biased okay) - $80,000,000

Brand-name toilet paper - $10,000

Smoked salmon and bagels every day - $25,000

Undergrad student center - $3,000,000

*Note: these prices are arbitrary- I’m a History, not an Ec or Math, concentrator.

In all honesty, though, this list made me realize that Harvard gets a lot of things right. Props, Lassonde.

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