Ah, the sweet sound of back-to-school dining hall chatter. So optimistic, so upbeat. And yet, there are some individuals who have the ability to destroy the sanctity of this safe space: looking at you, summer study abroad students. We get it, you had a great time and drank a lot of alcohol. But please, turn the enthusiasm down a notch by following these basic guidelines:
“When I was in (insert European country here)…”
Whatever you do, avoid starting your sentences this way. Whatever follows is bound to make your peers unnecessarily jealous. Furthermore, we just don’t care about every detail of your European lifestyle. Keep your thoughts on the virtues of long dinners starting at 9 p.m. to yourself.
Excessive throwback Instagramming
You clogged up our feeds all summer, so give it a rest during the school year. We do not need to see your bikini pics from exotic Mediterranean destinations. It’s time to get back to term-time social media posts that we know and love—we’re talking 60’s pics with Crimson Key.
Ditching your friends for your study abroad friends
We’re tired of the excuse that only your study abroad friends get what you “went through,” like it was some shared trauma that merits a survivor group. We were your friends before you became a cool European, and that should count for something.
Eschewing traditional college fun for more ~cultured~ options
Do you think you’re too classy for beer pong these days now that you’ve done a few wine tastings? Don’t trade out red solo cups for stem-less wine glasses. This is college, let’s maintain some basic level of grossness. It’s only right. Save the $20 bottles of wine for your future consulting lifestyle.
Taking only three classes because you have extra class credits
It is somewhat of a joke that parading around France counts for two Harvard classes, but that’s how it is. If you’re one of the lucky returners from study abroad, you have the luxury of ditching that fourth class that’s too hard. But please, keep your happiness (and schedule) to yourself. We’re already jealous enough.
We know you had fun. We know you’re a “changed person”. But we’re already tired of hearing it. So if you catch yourself making any of these post-study abroad mistakes, don’t be surprised if we say to you: dude, that’s rude.