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Vassar Says 'No' To Eli Beckoning
Unsettled, unhappy, and unnerved, 750 impotent Yale undergraduates this week begged the Vassar hierarchy to send them a few girls for their Derby Day weekend on May 1. In a matronly gesture, President Blanding of Vassar had previously restricted her charges to campus for the duration of the Eli bacchanalia.
In Cambridge, a Jubilee spokesman commented curtly, "Harvard has been unaffected."
Belabouring the English language with characteristic unconcern for accuracy, the Yale petition slyly referred to their nefarious weekend as "time-honored." Miss Blanding was undeceived. The Vassar girls will stay put.
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