Damsels Debauched By Student Satyrs?

We dirty-minded Harvard students are apparently ill-bred, licentious, decadent, lusty, oversexed, akin to the lower animals, undisciplined, and bent on destroying female virtue and jeopardizing stable society, the New England Journal of Medicine suggested in an editorial this week.

The Journal cited the recent HCUA report urging an extension of our "cozy touch of paradise," parietal tours and spined that the "loneliness and uncertainty that afflicts many students' should not be assuaged by permitting them to establish what might amount to a sort of informal concubinage under the college authorities."

"Girls have the most to lose in terms of self-respect and genuine and whole-hearted commitment to a future bonafide and relatively permanent companion in life's journey. No doubt many undergraduates, unwilling to bank for a while the kindled fires of a lusty adolescence, would scoff at the idea of female virtue as a worthy attribute."