Titters

TITTERS is nicely laid out.

That's the only good thing one can say about this smug, sorry collection of "female" humor which is at best unfunny, at worst offensive and exploitative.

Editors Anne Beatts and Deanne Stillman have chosen to capitalize on two grand American institutions: political feminism, and more important (judging by the sales figures so far) the Christmas shopping season. They've gathered numerous articles from women all over the country. After reading the illiterate prose that dominates the book, Isuspect the bulk of the contributors are classmates in some rural Pennsylvania junior high school.) The articles are largely in parody form, including take-offs of Ms. Magazine, Mark Eden ads, Sylvia Plath and beauty magazines.

The material is packed with possibilities, but in most cases the execution of ideas is sloppy and unimaginative and the tone is annoyingly self-congratulatory. Concepts clever enough to sustain several paragraphs are stretched into five page disasters. Here are some classic examples of the calculated groan:

* From a parody of Erica Jong: "He fiddles with my control panel, but my landing gear won't retract, so to speak."

* From classified ads: "Bicentennial Douche Bag--red, white or blue rubber bag covered with dime-sized portraits of the 38 presidents."

* From "How to Pick Up Girls--For Girls". "Now you can get the kind of girl you've always had a cruch on, like your high school Phys Ed. teacher."

Hey, these chicks are wacky, hunh?

Jokes about douche bags--real shockers, you know what I mean? The back cover plugs were written by close friends of the editors, get it? Doesn't the word "tampon" always make you laugh? No? Then I guess you don't have a sense of humor.

There are a few very fine pieces in Titters. They have been reprinted by permission of Harper & Row, The New York Times, G.P. Putnam's and Punch. But for the most part Titters consists of new work by women you've happily never heard of.