Poor Santa just called us with news you won't like:
Elves' Union #240 decided to strike.
But don't you despair--to the rescue we go,
Delivering gifts to the people we know.
Before we embark on much-needed vacation,
We offer some loot to the administration.
To Jeremy Knowles, now a British commander,
We wish that your budget could be a bit grander.
To Jerry Green, provost, good luck with your plans
To get all the turf-fighting deans to hold hands.
A unified Harvard? One dean we can't snub:
John McArthur receives his own platinum tub.
To dear President Neil, our fundraiser deluxe,
We hope you can round up a few billion bucks.
O Captain! Our Captain! We don't intend spite,
Endpaper: Due Apprehension in a Brave New WorldI got a virtual valentine. I received data-matches. I've been date-sited. Pass the chardonnay and turn up the Marvin Gaye.
Alas, Poor Trapper KeeperIn thirty years, more or less, we will be the age our parents are now. We will have children. These
The Crimson's Holiday Gift ListE VERY YEAR at this time, as vacation grows near The Crimson dispenses its gifts of good cheer. We hope
A Christmas Hit ListT HE SNOW'S a mere dusting, the sky's a bleak gray And finals are just a short four weeks away;
A Plan for Everyone"You that never done nothin'/ But to build and destroy/ You play with my world like it's your little toy."
Above The Battle: The Price We PayOne watched the lives [white people] led and the excuses they gave themselves, and if a white man was really