"Well, Dan." said the reporter, "you haven't been in Cambridge lately; we miss you; you used to make us forget the lunch we'd eaten, as we came from Memorial."
"Yes indeed," replied Dan, "I've been keepin' seclusive this winter. One reason is that I put my linen duster some place last summer, and forgot where I put it, and the weather's been so cold I didn't want to go out without an overcoat - lungs weak, you know. My friend Jared Sparks used to say that's my weak point - my lungs. I'm busy writin' a thing to speak to the boys in spring - when walkin's good - a lecture on languages, mighty fine - my chief douver - that's French."
"Dan., what do you think of your friend Oscar Wil -"
"Oh, he's a gosh darn fool; he got mad last night 'cuz I took out my clay pipe, the cussed fool. He said it wasn't emetic, or somethin' like that. I'd like to see'm take a good whiff at it. He'd think is was mighty emetic, I guess. How are you fellers gettin' along out there, any way? I tell you, the college aint what it used to be when my friend Edward Everett was there. I sent in my application for professor of chonology - keep the clock in order, you know - and they never noticed it. When they tried to get Max Miller, and couldn't, I sent 'em word I'd take his place, and they wouldn't have me. Oh, I tell you, the place's run down. Why, I used to pass around my hat among the boys after I'd got through lecturin', and get two or three dollars, and now! well, I'm glad if I get my hat back."
"What do you think of co-education, Dan?"
"Oh, he's the new fellow on the crew, is he? Well, I don't know him, but I knew his father - '42, I think - one of the smartest, high-tonedest fellows I ever saw. He gave me a white vest once, and a spur."
"How long you been boarding here, Dan'l? The last time I saw you wasn't stopping at any place in particular."
"Oh, I've been here some time. I got mighty tired livin' a la cart, you know, hangin' on wherever I got a chance, so I thought I'd try this for awhile."
"Did you go to the Greek play, Dan'l?"
"Oh no, I know Shakspeare by heart. I'd ruther hear him in the original, like my friend Salviny; but you've got to excuse me now; I'm goin' to lecture before the Woman Suffrage Society with my friend Ker'nel Higginson - I'm goin' to carry the pitcher of water on the stage" - and, rubbing his ancient beaver on his shiny coat-sleeve, Dan'l bowed the reporter out.