Unknown Students Want In, Lamont's Glass Door Yields

Two unidentified undergraduates tried an Alphonse Gaston routine in front of Lamont Library yesterday afternoon which resulted in a shattered glass door but no bloodshed.

According to witnesses, the pair approached the door from opposite directions. Both tried to open it at the same time. One man lost his balance and fell against the door with his shoulder, which splintered the glass with a loud crash. The door will have to be replaced.