News
Pro-Palestine Encampment Represents First Major Test for Harvard President Alan Garber
News
Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu Condemns Antisemitism at U.S. Colleges Amid Encampment at Harvard
News
‘A Joke’: Nikole Hannah-Jones Says Harvard Should Spend More on Legacy of Slavery Initiative
News
Massachusetts ACLU Demands Harvard Reinstate PSC in Letter
News
LIVE UPDATES: Pro-Palestine Protesters Begin Encampment in Harvard Yard
Harvard students are well aware of the countless ways in which our students, education and city are far superior to those of Yale. But as a reminder—and for the benefit of the hapless Elis making their way into beautiful Cambridge this weekend—The Crimson Staff has collected some lesser known, and often under-appreciated, face-offs between Harvard and the clearly inferior institution we call our rival.
Pride of the College:
Harvard: TR, Class of 1880; FDR, Class of 1904; JFK, Class of 1940.
Yale: Dubya.
Edge: Harvard
Legacy:
Harvard: 366 years of illustrious intellectual history.
Yale: A lock company.
Edge: Harvard
Every Student Should Have:
Harvard: An understanding of science, literature and the “ways of thinking.”
Yale: A gun.
Edge: Harvard
Football Star:
Harvard: NFL prospect Carl Morris ’03.
Yale: Star? Football?
Edge: Harvard
Presidential Power:
Harvard: President Summers: Former U.S. Secretary of the Treasury.
Yale: President Levin: “It is to Harvard that the whole world looks for leadership.”
Edge: Harvard
At The Movies:
Harvard: The feature films Legally Blonde, How High and Stealing Harvard—total gross over $125 million.
Yale: An undergraduate porno—totally gross.
Edge: Harvard
The Other HYP School:
Harvard: Princeton goes after our top professors.
Yale: Princeton goes after its admissions data.
Edge: Harvard
Student-to-Student Communication:
Harvard: Going wireless.
Yale: Restricting Kazaa. (Haha, suckers!)
Edge: Harvard
Community Issues:
Harvard: In search of more space to expand our Nobel-winning academic juggernaut.
Yale: In search of their hubcaps.
Edge: Harvard
As expected, The Crimson defeats the Bulldogs 9-0.
We predict a similar outcome at the game tomorrow—Yale falling defeated at the feet of the mighty Cantabs. The only difference will be a much larger margin of victory.
Want to visualize second-best? Just look into the Lux.
Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.