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Jonathan's Essay

By BeMo Academic Consulting



BeMo Academic Consulting is one of the most sought-after academic consulting firms in the world, famous for helping applicants with admissions to highly competitive programs and its staunch advocacy for fair admissions.

Successful Harvard Medical School Essay



Jim and I had only spoken once by phone and were now in a soundproof piano practice room in my dorm basement, after dark and out of cell phone range. My new piano student told me he lived in a sober house, was unemployed, and “had time to kill.” He wanted to learn piano and called me because he read favorable online reviews of my piano playing. I was somewhat flattered but mostly uneasy about what I was getting myself into. I have played jazz piano since age 11. My early focus was technique. I loved practicing and spent hours at the piano. Through Boston’s Berklee School of Music summer programs, I gained a solid foundation and connected with exceptional musicians. I led multiple ensembles in school and professional circles. At first, I played wherever I could, including non-paying venues, but as my music further matured, I performed at increasingly high-visibility settings. I particularly treasured playing for charitable causes such as Ronald McDonald House, Gift of Life bone marrow drive, and at Boston Children’s Hospital. During college, I taught jazz piano, helping my students navigate the complexity and nuance of jazz theory. In the last several years, a highlight of each week was
playing solo jazz in Yale’s cancer center lobby.

Although I could not help patients from the medical perspective, I felt that I made a small contribution when an improvisation on “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” would bring a smile to a patient’s face. To me, there are striking parallels between jazz and medicine. Jazz improvisation encourages freedom of expression and creativity within the confines of a musical structure that is unspoken but understood among performers. Medical practice emphasizes customization of care based on a patient’s unique circumstance within the boundaries of established care paths and standards. In jazz, musicians take turns at improvisation, while the rest of the band “comps” (jazz lingo for “accompanies”). A fine soloist leads without overshadowing. Effective comping highlights the soloist without drawing excessive attention. Jazz, dynamic and fluid, requires teamwork and the ability to listen. I believe jazz prepared me well for the seamless teamwork and collaboration, learning, and adaptability that are intrinsic to medicine. At Yale, I was drawn to Molecular Biophysics and Biochemistry for its scientific rigors and biological applications. A major focus of my work has been laboratory research. Under the guidance of my mentor Dr. Keith Choate, a brilliant physician scientist on the Yale faculty, I identified and studied the function of a palmitoyl transferase gene responsible for a cutaneous inflammatory disorder called erythrokeratoderma variabilis. I also observed Dr. Choate in the pediatric dermatology clinic at Yale New Haven Hospital. I vividly recall a young girl with brown scaly plaques covering almost her entire arm, her tearful efforts at hiding her arm as if she felt shameful, and her mother wringing her hands in anguish.

The medical team approached the girl gently, trying to put her at ease. When Dr. Choate mentioned the potential of genomic-driven medicine offering new therapies, her mother’s eyes lit up, even though the solution was not yet at hand. I had been fascinated with the gene from the molecular angle, but seeing firsthand the physical and emotional tolls from the disease strengthened my interest in developing “post-genomic” technologies. At the same time, moments like this remind me why I want to be a doctor. No doubt biomedical research is stimulating and rewarding, and I hope to continue research pursuits. But I want to work directly with patients and personally make a difference in their lives. While it is possible to make a difference through research, I find it particularly meaningful to contribute at the human-to-human level. My aspiration is to learn about the human body and its diseases and impart my knowledge and skills to patients to relieve suffering. Medicine is going through significant changes. There is hope that technologies such as high-resolution genomics may identify more biomarkers for disease diagnosis, prognosis, and therapeutic guidance. Refinements in DNA sequence technology and computational tools already allow higher and higher throughput at lower cost. Application of genetic analytics on a population scale will hopefully help make personalized medicine a reality. Healthcare delivery is also going through a redesign, with increased emphasis on value and teamwork.

I look forward to entering medicine at such an exciting time and feel well equipped from my training in molecular biology, computer programming, bioinformatics, and jazz to make a meaningful impact. After months of piano lessons, Jim played an awesome improvisation of “Mary Had a Little Lamb.” We had become friends and shared animated dialogues about art, religion, love, biology, and of course music. Jim was delighted that I also enjoyed rap, his favorite genre. I saw a transformation from aimless addict to proud-yet fragile young man. And then . . . he got a job! Jim was gainfully employed. He told me I was his inspiration. Little did he know that through the opportunity to teach him, grow with him, and observe his remarkable transition, I was in fact inspired by him.

Professional Review by BeMo Academic Consulting

The author of this personal statement has rightfully earned a spot at one of the top medical schools in the world. The introduction creates a sense of intimacy and intrigue, which entices us to uncover what happens next.

This personal statement then skillfully showcases Johnathan’s passion for medicine by intertwining his experiences in music and his interest in healthcare. He seamlessly draws parallels between the improvisational nature of jazz and the adaptive nature of medicine. Not only does this illustrate his deep understanding of both pursuits, but it also demonstrates his ability to think critically and make connections across disciplines, a crucial skill for a future physician.

Johnathan’s story reveals his other academic and non-academic achievements that he undoubtedly further explores in his Work and Activities section and during his medical school interview! But even here, in this succinct narrative of his research
experience
, he brilliantly showcases his intellectual curiosity. By demonstrating his achievements in research, Johnathan not only highlights his scholarly acumen but also his desire to alleviate patient suffering, which is a part of Harvard’s mission.

At the end, Johnathan masterfully uses the introduction and conclusion as bookends to his narrative, leaving us with a profound sense of closure and a hope that we may someday be under the care of this future physician.

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