DARTBOARD

Oakland Up in Smoke

We at Dartboard are dismayed that the city of Oakland has been forced to declare a public health crisis after the heavy-handed federal government closed down the Oakland Cannabis Buyers' Cooperative.

As the weekend approaches, the bong waters of Oakland are still. Hundreds of "cough sufferers" have nowhere to turn for medicinal relief (except for Robutussin, but that's been no help since they reduced the alcohol quotient in the '70s).

We hope the city council's declaration of emergency will be heeded in Washington. Oakland is a deadly place to live if you're not stoned.