The Fireman

Alright, so you have a problem set due tomorrow, an essay to write on a novel that you didn’t read and that isn’t listed on Sparknotes, and you’re entirely convinced that Facebook must be checked every five minutes. Perhaps you’d like some music to get you through what’s shaping up to be an all-nighter. Might I suggest experimental electronic band The Fireman’s latest release, “Electric Arguments?” Because here’s the thing: no matter how dismal the outlook might be, trust me, this CD will make you feel better about yourself.

In fact I’ll give you three reasons why your life couldn’t possibly suck as much as this CD:

1. That stack of work might seem daunting, but at least you’re being kept busy enough to avoid such poor decisions as The Fireman just made. Paul McCartney seems to have far too much time on his hands. The release of “Electric Arguments” by The Fireman marks the third time Paul McCartney has inexplicably decided to team up with 47-year-old musician and record producer Martin Glover, who even more inexplicably has dubbed himself Youth. Even after making their first album, “Strawberry Oceans Ships Forest,” which pretty much consisted of nine remixes of the same song, they still thought it was a good idea to try again.

2. No matter how much bullshitting you just did in that essay of yours, I guarantee it’s more genuine than the lyrics on this album. Following are a few samples. Track six, “Light From Your Lighthouse”—a ridiculous secularized version of “This Little Light of Mine”—features lyrics such as “Let it shine on / Let the light from your lighthouse shine on me.” And if that wasn’t schmaltzy enough for you, how about “Dance ’Til We’re High?” “We will dance / Light up the sky / Bells will ring out for our love… We’ll sing till we fly together / We’ll dance ’til we’re high together.” This all sounds well and good. But when sung by Paul McCartney and backed by church bells and violins, it’s effectively the most saccharine thing since Candy Land.

3. Think your essay lacks coherence? Don’t worry. Sir Paul and Youth one-upped you there too. “Electric Arguments” is a manic hodge-podge of songs. The noise heavy, Black Keys-esque opening track, “Nothing Too Much Just Out of Sight,” suddenly jumps to the much folksier “Two Magpies,” reminiscent of McCartney’s solo career. The tone somehow shifts in the last three tracks to feature the more electro-ambient vibe for which The Fireman was originally “known.” Banjo and harmonica make random appearances, as do drum machines, hushed whispers, flutes, violins, and far too many “nah nah nahs” and “ooohs.” Oh, and there are barking dogs.

So when you’re feeling down and out, just take a listen. I would seriously recommend this album, though for nothing other than a good laugh and a confidence boost. It’s so cheesy and awful that it’s almost good. Almost.