Horoscopes!

Pisces

Can’t stand another night of “Indian” food in the dining hall? Skip the HUDS variation on tikka masala and mix some Cinnamon Twists into your life.



Aries

With spring break over a week away, you’re looking to let off a little steam. Why not try yoga? There is nothing like Bikram to sweat the stress away.



Taurus

Mid-year rut? No better time to grab the bull by the balls! Strike up a conversation with that standout in section, and you might find yourself discussing Dante over dinner.



Gemini

Snagging that summer internship may seem harder than pulling a fast one on Widener security guy, but remember the world beyond BoA. Load up a rucksack and head West—worked for Kerouac!



Cancer

Admit it—your G-mail inbox is more crowded than Noch’s on a Saturday night. But don’t miss those gems in your spam folder: why not “learn the perfect trick of lovemaking”?



Leo

Sick of snow in March? Light up your life with a new flame—hey HBS Rugby Team heyyy.



Virgo

We’re in the midst of midterms and procrastination is beckoning, but save Gossip Girl for later. Spoiler: Chuck and Blair get married. Sorry we’re not sorry. XOXO.



Libra

Wondering if you really have 972 “friends” on Facebook? They probably don’t remember you, either—maybe it’s time to let go of those 80 kids from prefrosh.



Scorpio

With Mercury dancing in the east, you might find yourself a little off-kilter. Could be last weekend’s little wardrobe snafu—nothing a belt can’t fix.



Sagittarius

There is something to be said for blind idealism, but keep your guard up and be careful. Not everything is as perfect as it seems.



Capricorn

Something amazing is about to happen to you, but it’s all a matter of interpretation. We are prophetic in our vagueness.



Aquarius

Now that the parents have finally left town, let down your hair and do something crazy. It’s never too late to get started on the Harvard trifecta.