War-Torn Warriors

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

Co-Chair: Elizabeth W. Green ’06

When I first met Elizabeth, I made the mistake of calling her “Liz.” I rue the day. Somewhere in the added “E,” the awkward nickname “Eliz,” we ended up with a tenacious reporter and I ended up with a rad friend. Her provenance is the debate on gender politics, the purported existence of “Alabama” as a concept, the merits of the Harvard non-meritocracy, the enzymes involved in the digestion of gluten, the wearing of dangly earrings, the psychosomatic benefits of drinking Diet Coke. She’ll listen, she’ll smile, and she’ll tell you a thousand insightful reasons why you’re wrong. She’s also the most talented structural editor on staff. (You don’t know what it is, but you read the benefits. Ha!)

Jannie might be FM editorial’s heart. Evan might be its fortitude. Leon might be its wit. Stephen might be its humor. Haven and Meghan might be its style.

Eliz is its backbone. FM will miss her sorely. And who knows what I would be missing if I forgot the “E.”

—Annie M. Lowrey

Co-Chair: Jannie S. Tsuei ’06

Some people are exactly what they seem, some people are fronting, and then there are the rare few who fit in neither category. Jannie S. Tsuei ’06 is one of the rare ones. She’s not a ditz (she just smiles a lot), but she’s not hiding an inner anger or hatred, either.

Defying categorization is exactly the kind of thing Jannie would do. Nothing pisses her off more than stuffing people in pigeonholes. This is a quality that can make her completely infuriating to work with (she has been known to stay up all night wondering about the moral-ethical implications of publishing “As It Were”). It is also a quality that makes her a fantastic magazine editor. She won’t sleep until she’s sure she’s done her subjects right. Finally, it is a quality that makes her a total pleasure to work with, because even when Jannie hasn’t slept for days, she’ll stay up a few more hours just to make sure her colleagues have been done right, too.

FM probably does not realize yet just how much it will miss her.

—Elizabeth W. Green

Publisher: Evan R. Johnson ’06

It is arguable whether he contributes more to FM than he detracts. Evan is the sole reason anything gets done on production nights, but he is also the sole reason for many a tearful fight between Elizabeth W. Green ’06 and Jannie S. Tsuei ’06. Kidding. But the resident FM stud is so kind, reliable, and wonderful to have around that we should fight over him. Certainly, next year’s guard wishes they had Evan. “I hope to work with a publisher, who will [...] generally fill in the very large shoes that Evan leaves behind (I hear he wears a 12),” wrote one incoming chair in his shoot paper.

Evan once said that he should’ve been a Latin orator, but we’re glad his large presence and, yes, his overpowering voice are firmly here in the present.

—Jannie S. Tsuei

The Muse & Designer: Caitlin B. McKee ’06 and Kelly N. Fahl ’06

Ron Reason: the omniscient, omnipotent, and unseen God of FM’s design. Caitlin and Kelly: the omniscient, omnipotent, and always-seen-wearing-pink FM designers.

They’re all reminiscent of Greek deities (hence Caitlin’s position as Muse); they were always better-rested, more nutrient-filled, and thankfully far more practical than the rest of FM’s board. Responsible for working with content and photo, they held scales like Justice and spun beauty like Athena. Sometimes, they raged like Mars, like when we wanted all-text pages. After they did their thankless work, we wanted to stare at FM like we were Narcissus.

When everyone was tired, cranky, and cracked out (like Achilles?), Caitlin and Kelly delivered beautiful pages (like Ceres?) to shroud our oft-shoddy content (like Sibyl?). Every week, they dressed mutton (arnea) as lamb (amnos). We can’t say thank you enough.

Plus, they know all of the words to Kelly Clarkson.

—Annie M. Lowrey

Associate: Annie M. Lowrey ’06-’07

Though she authors in a tone that is the opposite of earnest, almost all the rest of the time Annie M. Lowrey ’06-’07 tells the truth: wonderfully, brutally, with vague hints of a British accent, and frequent droppings of obscure vocabulary words. This is not an easy skill, especially not if you are a nice person, which is the remarkable thing about Annie. In addition to being 100 percent genuine, she is also 100 percent nice. When you don’t know the meaning of most of the words she has just uttered, and you tell her, she won’t judge. She’ll point you to the OED. Or, as above, perhaps the Imagesetter.

Honesty, insight, enviable diction, and an even more enviable economy of language have made the magazine better for as long as Annie’s contributed. A fortuitous catch!

—Elizabeth W. Green

Associate: Meghan M. Dolan ’06

Someone smart once said that effortlessness is the most attractive human quality. In this case, Meghan’s the peerless, hottest cat on the block.

Yes, she’s funny. (She also hiccups with laughter at her own jokes.) She’s kind. She’s loyal. She has an uncanny ability to quote from “Sex and the City,” polishes even the dirtiest FTMs to a shine, and shotguns a beer faster than you can blink. And she does it all while smiling a snarl, exclaiming infectious nonsense (“Got To!”), and recalling her many enviously silly escapades. She’s basically everything FM wants to be, wrapped up in a puffy jacket and Burberry scarf. You wish you could make it look so easy.

—Annie M. Lowrey

Photo Chairs: Alexa J. Bush ’07 and Ravi P. Ramchandani ’07

Where oh where would we be without them? In a bland gray world, utterly devoid of pictures of girls in poofy party dresses, smirking FM eds, assorted Christians, ivy-clad Harvard looking beautiful, and—most importantly—Evan R. Johnson ’06 wearing sweatpants tucked into his socks and Tevas.

We love Ravi and Alexa for the candids that they took of our FM tenure (like late night dance parties) and the scathing (read: hilarious) criticism they gave of our content. Sample convo: “This Chris and Chris column is retarded. Can someone find us a whip, some handcuffs, and, like, maybe some whipped cream?” (Yes, yes we can.) Ravi, Cheshire-Cat smile permanent, led us in sexy photo shoots and insisted that Matthew R. Conroy ’07 be named on the masthead as Matt Cornroy. Alexa, all class, brought a little VES art technique and an eye for color (NO RED) to our bland magazine.

We never gave them guidelines. They always returned with hotness.

—Annie M. Lowrey

Illustrator: Shinn X. Chen ’09

We’re not sure why we got so lucky, but we sure are glad Shinn X. Chen ’09 walked into the building and our lives. In between economics midterms and sculpture sessions, Shinn comes and makes FM’s covers and spreads oh-so-beautiful.

And those dexterous fingers also go to good use in other settings....That is, Shinn plays a mean Beirut game (what did you think we meant?). FM beer pong master Meghan M. Dolan ’06 is still angry about that late, late Saturday night.

­­­­­­­­—Jannie S. Tsuei

Proofers: Hana R. Alberts ’06, Stephen M. Marks ’06, and Wendy D. Widman ’06

The triumphant trio, FM’s pink polo-clad proofers keep us (relatively) out of trouble with the law and various campus organizations. When the FM eds are giggling about yet another inane sex joke, the proofers giggle with us, then shoot us stern glances (translation: get me pages!).

Wendy has been with us longest and knows our feet-dragging ways best. Her tendency toward funny jokes (see page 19), alliteration (see page 19), and not treating The Crimson like it’s the be-all and end-all (see page 19) makes her presence enjoyable. Why did Widman cross the road? To get to FM!

Steve may be the almighty managing editor, but he is completely down with dancing on tables. And he buys us junk food. Yum­—on two counts.

Hana is so meticulous, she even numbers her corrections. But in between comments about commas and subheads, she still sprinkles hugs and thank-yous to the FM staff. For her, we’ll work hard to remember that Subheads Are Not Supposed To Be Capitalized. We are grateful to their presences and their libel-excising pens.

—Jannie S. Tsuei

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