We’re all socialized to believe something is the norm, and even if we are attracted to a specific trait because we’ve grown up being told that’s how it’s supposed to be, or seen everyone else acting that way, we can definitely learn to question that norm. Try to unlearn it. To expand our idea of attractiveness by trying to recognize where the damaging ideas of attractiveness come from.
In a rush to reach home this morning, you did not check the newspaper: After nine years, the assassination of a governor and federal minister who dared speak out in her defense, and a back and forth in the courts as well as the streets, Aasia Bibi’s conviction has been overturned by the Supreme Court. Riots are overtaking the nation.
There, I am thoroughly uncomfortable, and Here, I am thoroughly confused. There and Here, I am unsettled by my own privileges. I want acceptance, but I cannot possibly live with it, either.
Our next kiss: We are in his bedroom, and I tell him I can’t sleep with him. I do not tell him that I’ve never had sex because I am Still Afraid. I do not tell this to any of the boys I kiss, catching the occasional wetness in my eyes before they can notice.
Then, he turned off the light, but of course I kept going. I did not need to see my limbs moving, taking shape — he knew any possible form they could take anyway. He knew it better than anyone, and besides, now I could be wilder, even less controlled.