Fifteen Minutes: For the Sake of Argument

Oft-witnessed carrying his "Will Argue for Five minutes for One Dollar" sign around Harvard Square, the Argument Guy offers repartee
By T.s. Field

Oft-witnessed carrying his "Will Argue for Five minutes for One Dollar" sign around Harvard Square, the Argument Guy offers repartee without the hefty Harvard term bill. Last Thursday, Argument Guy met his match.

Argument Guy: Wanna argue? Five minutes for a dollar.

Fifteen Minutes: I want to argue with you. Okay, here goes.

AG: You only have one minute.

FM: No I don't, I have five. Um, okay. I think that Harvard is a good school.

AG: It's an elementary school.

FM: Why?

AG: Because it's very elementary. You know what I think?

FM: What do you think?

AG: It's elementary because they should really be dispensing acid to you guys before your classes. Really expands your realm of thinking.

FM: I don't think it does.

AG: Then you've never tried acid.

FM: I was a really good debater in high school.

AG: Time's up.

FM: So people really want to argue with you for money?

AG: I make 20 bucks an hour, kiddo.

FM: So what do people argue with you about?

AG: The one minute.

FM: No, I mean what do they argue with you about?

AG: The one minute.

FM: That's a rotten thing to do.

AG: You know the movie With Honors with Joe Pesci? That was about me. I'm the original Harvard bum. I have a T-shirt that says, "I'm Really a Lawyer." I used to sit in on Harvard classes.

FM: Did you ever go to college?

AG: I sometimes shower at Wellesley.

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