It’s Nov. 10, and you know what that means: T-minus four days until those concentration declarations have to go out. Sophomores, you ready? If not, FM’s got your back. For those over-achieving freshmen out there, this one’s for you too. Time to figure our lives out.
1) Do you enjoy college?
a. Eh. It’s alright.
b. I prefer to call it a “place of learning.”
c. Where else can I shoot up heroin without being frowned upon?
d. Enjoy it? I LOVE it. Room 13 can’t get enough of me.
e. I am above such mundane things. I’m also scared of social interaction. Please don’t hurt me.
2) What goes down when you fail a midterm?
a. There’s a curve, isn’t there?
b. I don’t have midterms, only long-winded, “analytical” essays that are perfect for pushing a political agenda.
c. I haven’t taken a midterm since eighth grade.
d. I hate VES concentrators.
e. Fail? Ha! I step on those who fail. Seriously though, I’m pretty non-violent.