By Linda Lee and Michelle Lara
Commencement would be incomplete without the amazing senior sales that have cheaper prices than Walmart. Everything — and we mean everything — is on sale. In fact, senior sales really make you wonder what people have in their dorms — and why. Here are some of the weirdest items that have been put up for sale.
Resume Portfolio: $5
Looks like this senior got the job of their dreams because they apparently don’t need this resume portfolio anymore. Whoever buys this will never have to worry about stumbling into a networking event unprepared ever again. This goes right up there with water as an essential item to carry around.
Dalmation Tail and Ears: Free
You clearly haven’t lived until you’ve graced Harvard’s campus with some endearing dalmation tail and ears on a cold Halloween night. These accessories probably have some funny stories behind it, and the next owner is bound to make their own memories with them as well.
Adorable Woven Cloth Poof: $25
You may be asking, “What exactly is a poof?” The real mystery is the fact that it was sold. Perhaps this will be a new sacred tradition among Harvard students as the adorable poof gets passed down from generation to generation, its purpose forever a mystery.
Movable Kitchen Table on Wheels: $60
This sounds like a rare artifact from the future. For $60, you can be 10 years ahead of your time and flex on your friends the next time they come over. It seems like this senior just couldn’t handle the clout of this movable table.
Mini Christmas Tree: $15
It’s never too early to start preparing for Christmas! This mini Christmas tree comes complete with fairy lights and small ornaments. What better time than May to start buying all the Christmas-time essentials! It’s rumored that a mini-Santa will actually come on his mini-sled to deliver some mini-gifts.
Supreme Backpack: $15
The real question is why you would buy this in the first place. Supreme arguably competes with Canada Goose for being one of the most sigh-worthy brands on campus. Make sure to complete the look with some salmon shorts and maybe a freshman lanyard.
Ceramic Dogs: $5
We’ve all experienced that empty hole in our hearts that just can’t seem to be filled up, some missing puzzle piece to a complete picture. Could it be true love that will fill the gap? A lucrative career? A stable family living and growing together? All of those are wrong because the obvious answer is this set of ceramic dogs.
Moose Pillow Pet: $5
Moose are amazing creatures. They’re even better in pillow pet form. Whether you just finished a hard organic chemistry final or are pulling an all-nighter at Lamont, these soft and comfortable pillows have definitely helped someone out. It’s especially a must for all Canadians!
If none of these items come across as strange to you, then you will probably host a senior sale with weird things of your own someday. At least we can find comfort in the fact that we all probably have some peculiar stuff sitting in our own dorms.
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